On June 28, 2007 , I had the honor of serving as a guest speaker for the HIV and Communities of Color Symposium at Columbia University in New York City . As I prepared my presentation, I reflected on the history of HIV/AIDS and my own personal journey.  

In July 1981, the New York Times reported an outbreak of a rare form of cancer among gay men in New York and California . This “gay cancer” as it was called at the time was later identified as Kaposi’s Sarcoma, the face of AIDS. About the same time, emergency rooms in New York City began to see a rash of seemingly healthy young men presenting with fevers, flu-like symptoms and a rare pneumonia Pneumocystis. This was the beginning of what has become the biggest health care concern in modern history.

Twenty-five years late the disease still plagues society. How did we get to this point?

Look back at 25 years of AIDS.

 Mark Cichocki, R.N.  

White gay men were the primary victims of this disease that we now call HIV. With their vast amounts of resources and financial backing, they were able to develop programs, disseminate information and control the spread of this disease, after many casualties in their community. We did not heed the warning, nor did we take a page from their efforts.

Fast-forward 2007 and HIV is no longer a disease of Caucasian Gay men, it has now become a disease of color, disproportionately affecting and devastating communities of color. With African-Americans accounting for approximately 13% of the United States population, we account for about half (49%) of the population infected with HIV. I count myself as part of this community.

Since my diagnosis in 1993 at the age of twenty-five, I have lost a great number of friends to this ugly and debilitating disease. As a self-identified gay man, knowing the risks, I engaged in unprotected sex with a partner who never informed me of his infection. I was not the only one. After his passing in 2006, I was informed that he had infected others without disclosing his status. To beat myself up for this err in judgment I will no longer do, but I take this time to hopefully reach out to my fellow African-American gay brothers and Same Gender Loving Individuals to take a stand.

We are losing a battle that is claiming the lives of future doctors, lawyers, teachers, productive members of our community, and yet we elect not to deal with it, because we as black folks don’t air our dirty laundry.” If we are not vocal about HIV, aren’t we contributors to the annihilation of our own community?

Living with HIV has altered my future. I know that I am going to die and I will say that it is a very scary thought. The challenges of loving and being loved present themselves at every turn, in every form; individuals who are afraid to even shake hands, knowing that HIV is not transmitted through casual contact, ignore me or place their hands in their pockets or behind their backs to avoid the friendliest of gestures. It hurts. I cry sometimes knowing that the simplest hug from a little cousin who might have been exposed to Chicken Pox can totally send my immune system into a tailspin. It tears me up, knowing that my mother may bury her only son because of his love for another man. It bothers me that brothers will bed me if I do not reveal my status, but will walk away when I am honest about it. It stings more than the words that were told to me almost fourteen years ago, “You are HIV POSITIVE.”  

I ask you, my fellow brothers to make a difference, take a stand. Let us not sit in judgment of those who are living with HIV or how they contracted it. Let our voices be heard in our churches, in our community, in our homes. If we do not teach our own, who will? Aren’t we part of a larger extended family that loves unconditionally and are giving of our hearts? I would like to think so. I know so. We can make a difference. The difference begins with you today, at this very moment.

I know it is very difficult to step out and try something new, believe me I do know this. However, in each of our communities, are agencies that are trying to curb the spread of HIV disease in our community. Let us take a page from the White Gay community and take care of our own. Make a call and find out what your local AIDS Service Organization needs. Are they in need in of volunteers to answer the telephone, to provide transportation, to serve a meal or just to open your heart to listen and to love? It does not cost a dime and in the end, know that you would have made a difference.  

The Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. stated in his historical speech:  

Well, I don’t know what will happen now. We’ve got some difficult days ahead. But it really doesn’t matter with me now, because I’ve been to the mountaintop.

And I don’t mind.

Like anybody, I would like to live a long life. Longevity has its place. But I’m not concerned about that now. I just want to do God’s will. And he’s allowed me to go up to the mountain. And I’ve looked over. And I’ve seen the Promised Land. I may not get there with you. But I want you to know tonight, that we, as a people, will get to the Promised Land!  

Will you walk with me my brother? Taking my hand in yours to make a difference in OUR COMMUNITY?  

Your Brother in the Struggle,  

Rodney