Hello to my friends at GBMNews. Many of you who have followed my article know that recently I moved from Columbus, Ohio to Ft. Lauderdale Florida. The move was primarily for professional reasons but one of the advantages to moving to the ‘Venice of America” is its very gay friendly environment and its international cultural flavor.  

I left Ohio in my car for a terrific 20 hour drive down Interstate 75, through the Smoky mountains and then through Atlanta. Stopped off to visit some friends and take in a few sights and then made the rest of the journey. My arrival in Ft Lauderdale was exciting because it literally is one of my favorite places in the world. Now, as a resident, I would get to experience all the wonderful things life has to offer a gay professional.

I reside in an area of town called Wilton Manors. This area has a high concentration of white gay professionals and also some terrific housing so, it’s a great fit for me. There are gay flags draped everywhere, a reminder that this area is very gay friendly. In Wilton Manors, if you look long enough, you will see gay couples proudly holding hands in a display of companionship and love. Although the area is mostly white, I have seen several black couples dong the same thing.

Wilton Manors is jut minute from downtown Ft. Lauderdale. Tourism here is largely gay and an huge marketing effort is in place to let people all over the world know that this is a gay city that loves its gay tourists. Wilton Manors has become the residential area of many of the gay professionals who live here in Broward County.

After getting myself moved into my apartment, I decided to take a short stroll along on of the main streets of Wilton Manors. It was another humid early autumn night and the area was jumping with happy hour revelers and gay shoppers, as well as a variety of every day families and others enjoying the city. With so much to see, I took a rest and got in line at the local ice cream shop. I ordered a Strawberry Sundae and sat outside to watch the locals while enjoying my treat. Then I realized I wasn’t in Kansas anymore.

As I sat alone at the bench spooning through a terrific sundae, a seemingly bright eyed employee of the establishment attended to her duties cleaning the area, collecting discarded sundae cups and other garbage. As she cleaned, I noticed here staring at me. Actually, I think it was more of a glaring. She continues cleaning and straightening while I tried to avert eye contact. She decided she was done, huffed and sat down net to me, leaning forward.

“Thank god for a straight person” she said.

“I’ve been passing out ice cream cones with rainbow sprinkles to these gays all day long and its nice to see that a real guy comes here to eat every now and then”

For the next 5 minutes, I listened to her spout off about being a single, attractive female living in an area where nobody is interested in her, namely because; as she put it, she’s at the bottom of the dating chain in the gay ghetto.

She told me about how these guys come to the store looking all nice and handsome and then turn out to be holding each others hands and kissing all in front of her. She told me about how the gay guys act rude and feel that they deserve better service than the straight customer because we are in gay Wilton Manors. She told me that she is tired of sissies acting stupid in front of her store because it’s a gay neighborhood.  Then, she apologized and offered me a coupon for a free Sunday; assumedly because I listened to her complain.

The entire situation has made me become much more observant of folks behavior here in the gay Mecca. I fear that she might be correct in her observations. I mean, is it cool to be a stupid gay jerk jut because we are in the gay Mecca? Do we have a right to pull rank on other people who work in our gay neighborhoods who are not gay?

Of course, if the reverse were to have happened to a gay individual in a straight neighborhood, all Civil Rights Hell would have broken loose. How can a straight person call a gay person names and get away with that? It’s a violation of civil rights!

Friends, I suggest that as we begin to become a group with an identifiable culture that we remain sensitive to the fact that we cannot assume that it is cool to shun others who do not live as we do or act as we do. I always believe it is important that you be who you are but, I also believe that it is not appropriate to shove it upon those who might not understand or believe as we do.

We must remember that weather we are in Wilton Manors, Boys Town, The East Village, DuPont Circle, Midtown in Atlanta or San Francisco (Gay Heaven of course) itself – we should remember that we, as gay individuals, are a minority still trying to find a niche in the average American culture. The anthem “We’re here, We’re Queer  - Get Used to it” might not apply to every gay person and it certainly isn’t something that every red blooded American is ready to have shoved up in their face.

Let’s use some restraint friends. Our lives are getting better  - One Day at a Time………