I want you to find a nice quiet place in your home, close your eyes and picture something with me. Imagine for a moment that we live in a world where it is perfectly okay to be who you are and love who you love without any apprehension or fear of retribution. Imagine a world where there is no need to be "out" because who you are and have every right to be would be just as socially acceptable as the traditional family of father, mother, daughter and son.

Now don't open your eyes yet: imagine that you have the ability to walk hand in hand with your partner, feed him or her lovingly off of your dinner plate at any restaurant in town, or simply slip your hand in his or her back pocket while walking down a busy street on a warm summer night.

For those of us that go to church, wouldn't it be nice to enter a place of worship and not have to hear a whole hour's worth of sermon based on that one verse in the book of Leviticus?

I've been thinking about this a lot lately, wondering that if our society paid less attention to orientation and placed more emphasis to content of character, just how much better we all would be. I don't think that the average person realizes just how much energy it takes to hate someone who happens to be different from them, no matter what that difference may be. I've been on the giving and receiving end, and now at this point in my life, I want to be on "no" end.

It still never ceases to amaze me at the amount of people that cling desperately to rogue stereotypes, as if the negative perception would somehow justify any ignorant comment or gesture that they chose to make. Or perhaps it elevates their own view of self because they may have nothing else in place to give them that sense of self-worth that we all need.

I'm learning now more than ever that in order to live and love better, we have to embrace ourselves - love our individuality and place sky-high value on our own worth. It doesn't matter what other people think, only what you think.

It's about time that we change our own perspective and realize that our gay identity is only a part of who we are - and that what we are is men and women with varying degrees of skin tone, hair textures, eye color, body weight and muscle tone. We are writers, doctors, teachers, executives, social workers, lawyers, sports figures and police officers. We have children - no children; we love, hurt, cry, and have each other's back, dream and share. It's time that we look at each other and take a step forward and hold our heads up and be proud of who we are as well as what we strive to be.

I know that there will always be bigots out in the real world - bigots who believe that they are the norm which in their own eyes translates to superiority. I also know that some of those bigots hold positions of power that can influence the quality of our lives…directly or indirectly. I wish I could tell you how to deal with it, but unfortunately everyone's situation is different - too vast to sum it all up with one simple solution in the contents of a one page article.

However, I'm still proud to say that I'm learning. I'm learning to love the people that I can call my true friends unconditionally, and the people that aren't my friends, you send a prayer up for. And for those of us that may not believe in prayer, you simply wish them the best, count what's right in your own life and keep on stepping without missing a beat. You do that and it takes the power away from them and it keeps it focused on you.

I'm still discovering and unwrapping pieces of myself, much like presents on Christmas morning, and what I'm finding is despite my faults and shortcomings, I'm nothing like the person that some people in my past tried to make me think I am. I consider myself a "work-in-progress". I've made my share of mistakes and at times may not have lived up to my true potential as a human being. The good news is that we can all perform a "do-over"…but it starts with feeling good about all aspects of yourself and working from there.

There's so much more to you than who you choose to sleep with or who you choose to love, and the reality is, it doesn't matter who "gets it", just as long as you do. You do, don't you?