Mr. Justin B. Smith has been involved in Gay Activism since 1999. He is 28 and a U.S. Air Force Veteran. Justin was born and raised in Justin B Smith's Websites
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By Justin Smith, Sr. Correspondent
When growing up one has to come to the realization that "one of these people is not like the others" namely them. As a gay man or lesbian you have to quickly adapt to the feelings that might want to hide from you family, or come out of the closet with.
| Fred (stretched out) and his family talk about Fred realizing he is gay in the new documentary, 'When I Knew,' which features similar testimonies from dozens of gay men and lesbians. (Photo courtesy Cinemax) |
"It's that moment when you realize that the world around you isn't really designed for you," says Fenton Bailey, one of the producers of the documentary "When I Knew," tells the Southern Voice.
The documentary is the latest project from Bailey and Randy Barbato, the award-winning filmmakers behind "Eyes of Tammy Faye," "Party Monster" and "Inside Deep Throat." The two producers have there own personal struggles when they came out themselves.
"For many of us, it is the moment we learn to hide and to lie about ourselves," Barbato says. "It can be a frightening and lonely time."
"When I knew" is filled with gut wrenching testimonies, stories and tears.
Julie, a 27-year-old social worker, didn't realize she had romantic feelings for women until she was two months pregnant. Her belly was full, but her soul was "empty" after ending a friendship with another female.
"I couldn't understand why a friend, a broken friendship, would cause me so much heartbreak and loss," Julie says in the documentary.
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By Justin Smith, Sr. Correspondent
When growing up one has to come to the realization that "one of these people is not like the others" namely them. As a gay man or lesbian you have to quickly adapt to the feelings that might want to hide from you family, or come out of the closet with.
| Fred (stretched out) and his family talk about Fred realizing he is gay in the new documentary, 'When I Knew,' which features similar testimonies from dozens of gay men and lesbians. (Photo courtesy Cinemax) |
"It's that moment when you realize that the world around you isn't really designed for you," says Fenton Bailey, one of the producers of the documentary "When I Knew," tells the Southern Voice.
The documentary is the latest project from Bailey and Randy Barbato, the award-winning filmmakers behind "Eyes of Tammy Faye," "Party Monster" and "Inside Deep Throat." The two producers have there own personal struggles when they came out themselves.
"For many of us, it is the moment we learn to hide and to lie about ourselves," Barbato says. "It can be a frightening and lonely time."
"When I knew" is filled with gut wrenching testimonies, stories and tears.
Julie, a 27-year-old social worker, didn't realize she had romantic feelings for women until she was two months pregnant. Her belly was full, but her soul was "empty" after ending a friendship with another female.
"I couldn't understand why a friend, a broken friendship, would cause me so much heartbreak and loss," Julie says in the documentary.
"When you have that moment of discovery, it's like time stands still," she says, while obnoxious stock footage of outer space rolls. "And you feel so good, and then you get so scared because you don't know how people are going to respond."
"When I Knew" contains plenty of stories of woe, including people who were disowned by their families or excommunicated from their churches.
Journalist Tom Gilbert, 50, talks about a devastating experience for his father, who discovered Gilbert was gay - and subjected to casual ridicule - after reading comments from classmates in Gilbert's high school yearbook. Karen Darcy, 45, recalls the homophobic teasing she experienced when, at age 11, some of her friends caught her looking at the models in a Playboy magazine.
Chris Daniels, an adorable and energetic 20-year-old, is so giddy with self-awareness that he "emits rainbows or sparkles out of my ass." Daniels remembers realizing that he was a "flaming faggot" when he would watch "The Little Mermaid," then rush to the bathtub to reenact the animated musical.
"When I Knew" features 16 "spotlight" interviews, interspersed with snippets from more than 100 others. In one particularly affirming batch of clips, anonymous voices describe their moment of clarity with statements like, "I felt relief," "I was pretty excited about it," "Oh my god, this is heaven," and "This is right, this is it."
Don't miss this hard hitting documentary on June 25th, 2008
MORE INFO:
'When I Knew'
June 25, 7:30 p.m.
Cinemax, Comcast channel 341
www.wheniknew.com